Depth.

"I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life . . ." Henry David Thoreau

"I'll take my cold, cold heart
I'll take my unrenewed mind
I'll take Your word in my hand
And I'll give You time, to come and melt me . . .
Just let my heart be alive
Let me be living deep, deep on the inside" Misty Edwards What Only You Do

Who would say they're against living deeply?
I think it sounds like a pretty good idea.
However, I'm finding that it doesn't really come naturally. It's much easier to be shallow and not think too hard about things.

Alicia and I have been becoming better and better friends with Henri Nouwen through this book we're reading together. Today he told us twice (so that we wouldn't forget) that this brief life we live here is just a very small portion of the timeline of eternity. And the point of this brief time we have here? To say to God: "I love you too." To say this with our whole lives.

Here's my true confession for the day:
I'm afraid of missing the point. I'm afraid of living a shallow life and one day stepping back and being horrified at how similar it is to everyone else in the whole world--worrying about money, working only for the weekend, grasping for a sense of security that is no security at all. I feel like this mentality really does set in with age. Yikes. Never thought it would.

Henri says, (and I think Jesus would probably also agree), that the answer to living a deep life is understanding that we are the beloved. Here's what he says,

"Maybe I can just remind you of that story of the multiplication of bread. You remember there was a little boy and everybody said that he was not worth anything. But, he had five loaves and five fishes. This little boy was received by Jesus and He took these five loaves and five fishes. He broke the bread after having blessed it, and He gave it, and in giving it multiplied and it was enough for everyone to eat.

That story says something about our lives. We are little people, but if we believe that we are chosen, that we are blessed, that we are broken, to be given, then we can trust that our life will bear fruit. It will multiply. Not only in this life, but beyond it." -Henri Nouwen